


Long Distance Lullaby

by AnaCarlyle



Series: Start a Riot [1]
Category: Once Upon A Time - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Everything inbetween, F/F, Fluff, Long Distance Relationship, Phone Sex, swanqueen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:54:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 15,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25101223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnaCarlyle/pseuds/AnaCarlyle
Summary: Regina meets an unlikely friend on the internet, but will their friendship bud into something more?Rated M for later chapters
Relationships: Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan
Series: Start a Riot [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1930804
Comments: 30
Kudos: 155





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Well, finally decided to start writing a full-fledged fic. I hope you all enjoy! There will be a sequel!

The last place Regina Mills expected herself to be was in a chat room at 1am on a Saturday. Yet here she was.  
The 25 year old huffed and hit the “next” button on the video chat, graced with yet another manly bit she would rather not see. It had been like this for almost 15 minutes; horny men and girls that were way too young to be on such a video site, even if it claimed to be a “clean chat”. She was ready to call it quits when the sound of Bon Jovi’s “Living on a Prayer” played through her speakers. Her cursor moved from the red X in the corner of her browser as she smiled at the woman on her screen. She was laying on her stomach, her laptop situated in front of her.

  
Regina had been lazy with her tags on the site, mainly adding her favorite television shows and a few books, and the two had matched under “Lord of the Rings” which was one of Regina’s guilty pleasures. She owned all the books and movies, and even a few replica pieces.

**You: Hey**  
**Stranger: Hi! So...LoTR? Favorite character?**

Regina chuckled to herself as she typed out her response, noticing the blonde turning down her music. She paused her typing for a moment, cocking her head. “Oh? Do you actually have your sound on?” She asked, lifting her hands from her keyboard.

  
The sound of the girl laughing came through her speakers now, a grin forcing its way across Regina’s lips.

  
“Yep!” The girl said, popping the “P” at the end of the word. “It’s kinda rare to find people that actually want to talk.” She said, shrugging.

  
“Agreed. I usually mute it because of obnoxious music.” Regina said, scrunching her nose teasingly. “But you have good taste.”

  
The blonde laughed and shook her head, her golden curls tumbling over her shoulders. “Why thank you. So, favorite character?” She asked, grinning widely.

  
“It’s going to sound so cliche, but I adore Galadriel. I hate to be the typical lesbian and say that, but I also love Cate Blanchett. What can I say? I have a thing for blondes.” The brunette winked over dramatically, both of them bursting into laughter. “I’m sorry! That was so bad!”

  
The blonde on the other end just laughed, but Regina could see the blush hinting her cheeks. “Well then I must be a horrible bisexual. My favorite is Bilbo.” The blonde said, hiding her face behind her hands. “He’s a great character, okay?”

  
“Hey, I’m not going to disagree with that.” Regina said, shaking her head. “At least you didn’t say Legolas. I would have seriously judged you for that.” She teased, loving the way the blonde’s cheeks tinted an even deeper shade of red.

  
“Right...well Orlando Bloom is pretty hot…” The blonde stuttered, placing her head in her hands. “Don’t judge me! I can feel you judging me!”  
Regina laughed deeply, a huge grin on her face. “So, what else are you into?”

  
——  
They spoke for nearly four hours. About pretty much anything they could think of. Their favorite TV shows, favorite books, about their hobbies, likes and dislikes.  
Regina was laying down with the laptop by her head, both of the girls shamelessly laughing and flirting at this point. Regina felt so relaxed talking to her, and she could tell the blonde was too.

  
“Listen, it’s 5am and I’ve gotta get to sleep. I’m going to regret staying up so late and talking to a beautiful woman.” They still hadn’t exchanged names, but neither of them had thought about it. Regina worried her lower lip for a moment, truly not wanting to go. “Would it be okay if I got your number?” She asked, her cheeks heating up.  
She watched as the blonde’s did the same, overjoyed when she nodded quickly.

  
“I’m Emma, by the way. I don’t think we ever told our names.”

  
Emma. Regina loved the way it sounded coming from her lips as she repeated it, grinning like an idiot.

  
“I’m Regina.” She said, typing her phone number into the chat space. “There, now you won’t lose it. Won’t your boyfriend be jealous you got a cute girl’s number?” She joked. Smooth, real smooth Mills.

  
She watched Emma chuckle nervously and her stomach. They hadn’t discussed their relationship statuses quite yet, and Regina already didn’t like the sound of that chuckle.  
“No...but my girlfriend might.” Emma said, chewing her bottom lip. “I hope that doesn’t change things. I could really use a friend.” She quickly added, her green eyes searching Regina’s picture for any subtle hints she was uncomfortable.

  
But Regina remained stoic and nodded. “I could use a friend, too. I mean, I didn’t expect to find one on here. Kinda just came to fuck around.” She said, smiling at her screen.  
The blonde nodded, returning her smile. “I completely understand. I was just hoping to find short conversations. But I guess I’ll text you? Where are you? You said it was 5am. It’s only 2 here.” She said, squinting at the tiny clock at the bottom of her screen.

  
“I live in a tiny town on the coast of Maine. What about you?” She asked, stretching her body out, her muscles protesting at the movement.

  
“I’m right outside of San Francisco.” Emma said, frowning. “Of course we’re on opposite sides of the country.”

  
Regina yawned widely, blinking a few times. “I’ve got work in six hours, so I’ll text you when I wake up.” She said, her phone lighting up with a new message. She hadn’t even seen Emma pick up her phone, but there was just a “hi” message. “I’ll talk to you later, Emma.” She said, waving.

  
Emma waved back, smiling brightly. “Bye Regina! It was nice talking to you!”

  
Regina disconnected, closed her laptop and placed it next to her bed. She yawned again, falling back onto her pillows and plugged in her phone. “Four hours of sleep.” She mumbled, shaking her head. Tomorrow was going to be a long day.

  
——  
Across the country, Emma was still smiling at her laptop, her heart racing as Regina texted her back “goodnight Emma!”

  
She hadn’t lied to Regina about her relationship status, but she had lied about the status of the relationship. Her girlfriend, Lily, had stormed out earlier that night after a fight over something stupid, leaving Emma alone and hurting. The fight had been partially her fault; she had forgotten to do the dishes from the previous night, but Lily had blown it out of proportion as usual. The two women had been fighting a lot lately, causing their three year relationship to slowly disintegrate. Even at 20, Emma knew the signs of a toxic relationship.

  
She had grown up in foster care, and that’s where she and Lily had met. Lily had been in one of the group homes with her when they were thirteen, but when Emma was transferred to a family, she and Lily had lost contact until she had shown up on Emma’s doorstep three years ago needing a place to stay. They had agreed to split the rent for the two bedroom apartment, and their relationship crossed the line between friends and lovers.

  
But now everything was falling apart and Emma wasn’t sure what to do. She could afford the apartment by herself, but the thought of being here without Lily made her heart constrict in her chest. It had been their home for the last three years and she couldn’t bear the thought of living there if they broke up.

  
Emma closed her laptop as she settled back into her pillows, sighing softly to herself as her thoughts wandered until she finally fell asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I said I wasn’t going to post another chapter until next week....oops?  
> Sorry for any mistakes, I’m just honestly trying to get this story out of my head

Regina didn’t hear from Emma for almost a week, and yet she was still constantly checking her phone. She itched to send the blonde a message, but didn’t want to overstep things. She knew they both had lives, and Emma had a girlfriend.

Exactly a week after their first meeting, she finally decided to send a message. Her fingers hovered over her phone screen, trying to think of what to say. She laughed lightly to herself as she thought of sending a “You dead?” text, but opted for a longer message instead.

**Hey, Emma. I hope you’re doing well. I was reading a fan fiction earlier, and your favorite character was mentioned, oddly. Just thought of you and wanted to check in on you. -RM**

She paused a moment, her thumb however over the send button. She silently hoped that it was an okay message before pressing send.

She wasn’t expecting a reply right away as she pushed the bathroom door at her job open, stuffing her phone back into her pocket. She worked at an antique bookshop on the weekends and a few days during the week, attending college the rest of the days.

At 25, she was a late bloomer. She had spent two years after high school traveling Europe, spending almost a year in Spain. She had loved the country; the people and the language had captured her heart. Even if she was only half Puerto-Rican, her father had taught her of his heritage and had even spent a month with her in Spain before he died.

She shook the thoughts of her father from her head, the pain still fresh in her mind. It had only been a year since his passing, and it still stabbed a knife through her heart.

Grabbing another cart of books to sort through, she plopped down on the couch in the tiny seating area, pulling the cart to her. Each book had to be checked for damage, and if was deemed acceptable, it would be shelved. It was Regina’s least favorite part of her job, the most time consuming part. She had to page through every donated book, checking for water stains and rips. Every so often, Mallory, the shop owner, would bring her a box of books she had purchased, usually filled with rare editions of books. She loved sorting through those, and would often spend hours reading them. Mal didn’t mind much, not when most of their sales were online now. But the shop owner refused to close the dinghy store nestled between the pawn shop and the pharmacy. She claimed it was because there were still customers that came in, but Regina knew it was because Mal was too attached to the small store.

A few hours later, Regina’s phone buzzed in her pocket. Her heart raced as she pulled it from her pocket, but then dropped as she realized it was a text from her boss. She tucked the phone back into her jeans, knowing the text would be about closing up. It was nearly 6 by then, and she still had to do her closing routine.

She was out of the shop by seven, her entire body dragging from the soreness in her muscles. She checked her phone one last time as she walked home, surprising even herself with how disappointed she was that there was still no text from the blonde on her phone. She knew there had to be a logical explanation for the younger woman not texting her back, but she hoped it wasn’t anything bad.

  
———  
Emma’s week had been terrible to say the least. Lily had come back early in the morning, spewing apologies about yelling and promising to never let herself walk out like that again. Emma knew they were empty promises, but she still forgave her. It wasn’t that she was a pushover, she was exhausted from constantly fighting with the one person who was supposed to love her. She wasn’t happy anymore, but the thought of leaving scared her more than the thought of staying. She was tired of jumping place to place after doing it all her life. The nagging feeling of settling for Lily was deep in her chest.

It was Monday morning when the rope finally snapped for Emma. Lily had woken up in a bad mood and had kicked Emma from their bed, snapping that she was keeping her awake. When Lily appeared an hour later, Emma was sat at their kitchen table, a cup of coffee in her hands and her face blank of all emotions.

“I want you gone. End of the month.” Emma said, her gaze not leaving the coffee cup, afraid her emotions were going to get the best of her. She wasn’t one to cry, but she could still feel the tears stinging her eyes. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Lily freeze, her hand hovering over the coffee maker.

The brunette spun on her heel, facing her. “Are you breaking up with me?” She practically shouted, her face flushed with anger and hurt.

Emma scoffed, finally looking up from the coffee. Her heart dropped to her stomach as her fingers tightened against the mug, almost hard enough to break it. “It’s been a long time coming, Lily. Don’t try to deny it. We’ve been fighting for months. I’m just tired of it. We used to be so good.” She sighed a defeated sigh, her shoulders slumping.

Emma was shocked by Lily’s reaction, the woman coming over to her and pulled her up into a hug. She had expected an explosion, much like her initial reaction. She felt Lily shake against her, realizing she was crying. Emma delicately wrapped her arms around Lily, burying her face into her neck. “I’m sorry, I can do better.” The younger girl choked out as she gripped onto Emma, but they both knew it was a lie. They weren’t meant to be, they had been there for each other when they needed to be and that time was over.  
Emma pulled herself away from Lily, holding her at arm’s length. “I’ll always love you, Lily, but our lives are too different now. I know you’ve been wanting to move to New York. So do that. I’m not going to hold you back.” She was being mature, something she had been forced to be since she was a child.

Emotions flickered across Lily’s face, from anger to betrayal and then, finally, understanding. “I’m sorry for everything, Emma. I’m a shitty girlfriend.”

Emma just shrugged, not having the energy to argue with Lily, or offer her any more words of encouragement. She had been fighting this battle for too long. And she could tell they were both done fighting.

  
————  
The rest of the week only got worse for the blonde. She spent most of it with her head in her books, studying for finals and tests coming up. Emma was pursuing a career in social work, and it was emotionally draining on her. She would be working with children in the foster system, a way for her to try and improve the lives of children who grew up like her. It was the only logical thing to do in her mind, nothing else really sparked her interest.

By Wednesday, she had only gotten a few hours of sleep, most of her nights spent laying awake staring at the ceiling as she realized her world was changing. Lily had already begun to apartment hunt as they had agreed Emma would take over the lease again. She would have to pick up hours at work again to pay for it, but she didn’t mind. She worked as a math tutor for a local middle school and usually made her own hours.  
Thursday wasn’t much different, except a fight between her and Lily over who would be taking what. They had bought some furniture together, and were battling over who would take it. Emma eventually gave in after a near-screaming match and let Lily have the living room set, as long as Emma was allowed to keep the bedroom set. She was emotionally exhausted by Friday, her mind a complete haze.

The blonde was getting out of class, her eyes drooping slightly as she checked her phone. She had a new message from an hour ago, a small smile forming on her lips as she read the message from her newest friend. She felt guilty for a moment, realizing she had forgotten to text Regina back a week ago, but her week had been so hectic. She typed back a response as she got onto the bus, plugging her headphones into her phone.

**Sry for not texting back sooner, it’s been a hell of a week. I’m hanging on, honestly.**

She hit send before closing her eyes and leaning her head back, her knee jumping to the beat of the song.

—-

Regina was arriving home when the new message popped up on her screen, frowning as she read it. She was no stranger to weeks from hell, it seemed the first years in college were always like that. She greeted her mother, who was in her office before she made her way upstairs.

Cora Mills wasn’t an easy woman to get along with, but after Regina’s father had died, things became worse. She became more controlling of Regina, keeping the young woman under her thumb at all times. Regina dreamed of the day she graduated college, finally able to get away from her mother. Cora had agreed to pay for Regina’s late education, as long as she stayed under her roof while she pursued her degree in political science. She was expected to run for mayor by the time she turned 30, following in her mother’s footsteps. It wasn’t exactly what she wanted, but she would never dare to go against her mother’s wishes. But that was her life, always controlled by her mother who “wanted the best for her”.

Flopping unceremoniously onto her bed, Regina typed out a response to Emma, blowing a strand of hair from her face.

**Just got home from work. Hope everything is okay. I’m always here if you need to talk to someone.**

She hit send before starting to prepare for bed. She showered, keeping her phone near her, brushed her teeth and hair and climbed into bed before 9. She contemplated opening another fic to read before her phone screen lit up, indicating a call. Her heart kept in her chest as she read Emma’s name on the screen, quickly swiping to answer it.

“Emma! Hey!” She said, her voice full of excitement. She frowned as the other end was silent for a moment, a soft sniffle coming through.

“Lily and I broke up a few days ago.” Emma finally said, her voice small. The blonde was sitting on her bed, a bottle of Jack in between her legs. The reality of their breakup and hit Emma when she had arrived home to find all of Lily’s things packed in boxes and a note saying she’d be by later in the week to pick them up.

“Oh, Emma…” Regina trailed off, unsure how to comfort the younger woman. She had been a similar position before, her high school lover had left her in the blink of an eye, driven away by her mother when she found out about their affair. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” Regina sat up in bed, shuffling to sit back into the pillows.

The blonde was quiet for a moment, quickly taking another sip from the bottle. “I don’t know, honestly. I was kinda numb before and now I’m just drinking away the pain. We were supposed to be forever, Regina. But she became so mean and I couldn’t deal with it anymore.”

Regina’s heart swelled in her chest, feeling proud for the woman she barely knew. “That’s a big step, Emma. You realized the toxicity and you left. You’re very brave.”

Emma snorted, taking another drink. “It took me a year to finally build the courage. I’m not sure I’d call that brave. I was comfortable but not and I settled for being unhappy.” She had consumed almost a third of the bottle at this point, her filter slowly dissipating. “You know, we hadn’t had sex in almost six months. How pathetic is that?” She paused, laughing lightly. “Sorry, I don’t know why I told you that. I’m a little drunk.”

“I wish I was. Don’t worry about it. It’s what friends are for. I mean, I consider us friends. I know we’ve barely spoken but…” she stopped herself, wrinkling her nose. “Anyway, I’ll listen to your rants or whatever you want.”  
Emma thanked her, but still quickly changed the subject. “So what do you do for work?”

Their conversation over the next hour and a half became more of getting to know each other’s personal lives, Regina praising Emma for her choice of profession while Emma asked endless questions about the books Regina often got to handle.

Emma continued to drink, enjoying her drunk state now that she wasn’t wallowing in self pity.

“You’re the best Gina.” Emma slurred slightly, over half the bottle gone now.

Regina laughed into the phone, now curled up in bed with her head on the pillow and the phone placed next to her. “It’s time for bed, Emma. You’ll be regretting drinking this much tomorrow at work.”

“But a-least I got to talk to you!” Emma chided, giggling into the phone. “And thanks for making me feel better. That’s an honest statement. I’m not sure how I’ll feel tomorrow, but I can always call you.”

Regina smiled, her eyes drifting shut. “That’s right, Swan. Because you’ve got a best friend who’s always gonna be there for you, now.” They had briefly discussed their friendships at a point in their conversation, Emma revealing she’d never had a best friend before Lily, and Regina quickly took claim to the title. “Now go to sleep, drunkie. Don’t forget to sleep on your side, I don’t need you aspirating in the middle of the night.”

Emma just snorted on the other end of the phone, mumbling something incoherently. “I’ll text you tomorrow, Gina. Have a good night.”

Regina’s smile still hadn’t left her face as they both said goodnight before hanging up. And she could swear that she continued to smile even as she slept.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long to upload! Been dealing with a lot of personal crap that has left my muse basically dead. Going to try my hardest to update more often!

Over the next month, the two girls became closer, not going more than a few hours without talking to each other. It had been a particular hard day in class for Regina, her exhaustion turning to a slight bitchiness as it sometimes did.

**I swear one of these days I’m going to bite off my professor’s head. She’s too aloof in her teaching. I’m here to learn, not to fuck around.**

**Remind me never to get on your bad side, Mills.**

**Ha ha, very funny Em. I doubt you’ll ever get on my bad side. Plus you can throw me some puppy dog eyes and I’ll forgive you.**

**I’ll keep that in mind ;)**

Regina laughed to herself as she got in her car, preparing to drive back to Storybrooke. Her drive to and from the college campus was almost an hour, as Storybrooke had no college.  
Regina’s phone connected to her Bluetooth as her phone rang, not hesitating to answer it.

“Shouldn’t you be at work?” She asked, her eyes still on the road.

“I had a kid cancel. Something about the flu, so fuck that.” Came the blonde’s voice through her car speakers. “And I’m bored so I wanted to talk to you!” Emma said, her voice light and chipper.

“So you’re going to distract me while I’m driving?” Regina teased, her fingers drumming against her steering wheel.

“Yep! You know I adore distracting you.” Emma quipped, laying back on her bed. “So how was your day besides your aloof teacher?” She asked, settling herself back against the headboard.

Regina curled her upper lip, rolling her eyes. “It was boring. And my mother insisted on lecturing me this morning about my school work, even if my grades are perfect. Apparently I haven’t been spending enough time studying.”

Emma huffed on the other end, rolling her eyes. She knew how Cora treated her daughter, and didn’t like her in the slightest. “Well maybe you should spend more time studying instead of talking to me.” The blonde teased, but then sighed softly. “I’m sorry, Gina.”

A warmth filled Regina’s heart at the nickname, something she would have never allowed anyone but Emma to call her. “Thanks, Emma! Since you’re home tonight, do you want to start movie night early?” Regina asked as she drove onto the highway, relieved she could focus more on the conversation now she was out of the slightly bigger city.

“I’d love to!” The blonde said, a wide grin on her face. It had become a sort of tradition to sit down on Friday and Saturday nights to a movie shared between their screens, thanks to websites that allowed it. They had been doing it for three weeks; Emma had suggested they watched a horror movie one night and it had just fallen into place. “I was actually thinking we could watch something funny instead of scary today. No matter how much I love to watch you cower in fear, I think your heart needs a break.”

“I do not cower!” Regina snapped, her voice raising slightly. “It’s not my fault you chose the movies with the biggest jump scares!” She ended her sentence with a laugh and shake of her head, feeling the tension of the day slowly seep from her body. “But that’s fine, I don’t mind. What were you thinking about?”

“I was actually thinking about Warm Bodies. I’ve heard good things about it, and I’ve never seen it.” The blonde replied, her voice lowering in slight embarrassment.

“You want to watch a Romeo and Juliet movie?” Regina asked, her brow raising slightly. “Are you just trying to find something I like?” She exited the highway, coming closer to Storybrooke. “I mean, I’m not complaining but I didn’t think chick flicks were your thing.”

Emma shrugged her shoulders, laughing. “They’re not, but I figured there needs to be some positive time with me that isn’t filled with terror.” She said, reaching over to pull her laptop from under her bed. “And I guess a cute movie is a nice break.”

“Any time with you is a good time, Em. You’re my best friend.” Regina said, a huge smile on her face. “I just put up with the scary movies because I get to talk to you.” She rolled her eyes at how cheesy it sounded, but she had stopped caring about the flirting a few weeks ago. She was obviously attracted to the younger woman, but she was hesitant to tell her. She didn’t do long distance relationships, especially because Emma was on the other side of the country.

The blonde’s cheeks turned a slight shade of pink as she booted up her computer, keeping her cell sandwiched between her shoulder and ear. “Right, because I’m such a joy to talk to.” She grinned, her eyes closing momentarily as she sighed softly.

\----

Regina had surprisingly loved the movie, the two women laughing and crying together.

“I admit this was a nice change from the usual shrieks you get to witness.” Regina said, wiping the tears from her eyes at the final scene. “I think we need a few happy endings before I dive back into murder and gore.” She laughed, leaning back to lay across her bed, her laptop by her head.

“You are such a sap, Regina. It’s a wonder you’re single.” Emma said, her eyes rolling back as she scoffed playfully.

Regina paused, chewing on her lower lip as she thought for a moment. “I actually have a date on Friday.” She said, her eyes darting around her screen, gauging Emma’s facial expression.

Emma’s smile faltered for only a moment, but she grinned at her screen. “That’s great, Regina! Tell me about you!” The truth was Emma didn’t want to hear about this woman. She felt emotion bubble into her throat, but quickly swallowed it down. She had to be happy for her best friend, no matter the cost.

“Well, her name is Dani. We actually met at school last week, but we’ve been texting non-stop and she asked me out. I was a little shocked, but she’s looking for the same as me.” Regina said with a small shrug.

“Well I’m glad you’ve found someone.” Emma said, not hiding the fact her smile was slipping. “Listen, Regina. I gotta go. I’ve got to be up early for some work thing. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” Emma quickly closed her laptop, her jealousy growing to irritation. She hadn’t realized how invested in Regina she was, but she felt betrayed. She had thought they were building something, the idea sending her heart sinking to her gut once she realized that they had completely separate lives, only connected through a screen.

Disentangling herself from her sheets, Emma decided a shower was due, the cold water hopefully quelling her rising irritation. She, of course, had lied about work. She didn’t have to tutor until 4 tomorrow, but Regina didn’t need to know that.

Across the country, Regina was left staring at her screen, her face contorted in confusion. She had wanted to share her happy news with her best friend, but instead got shut out. She had always counted their flirting as harmless, but she realized they hadn’t actually talked about how harmless it was. She shut her laptop with a groan, falling back onto the pillows. She had hurt Emma without meaning to, and she knew she was going to have to fix it, one way or another.


	4. Chapter 4

It was three days before Emma called Regina again, apologizing for her rash behavior.  
She was walking to her beat up yellow Beetle when she finally hit the “audio” button, the line ringing. 

“Emma.” The breathy answer came, a rush of air leaving Regina’s lungs in relief. 

Emma awkwardly scratched the back of her neck as she leaned against the door of her car, sighing nervously. “Hi...I wanted to say I was sorry. I don’t know why I reacted the way I did. I guess I realized I wasn’t over Lily.” The lie, well half truth, came out easily. She had realized her heart had dropped because she was alone, no matter how much she currently wished she wasn’t. “I was just upset because I wanted to feel that way too. To be excited about meeting someone new.” She rushed out, not giving Regina the chance to speak. 

It took a moment of silence for Regina to respond, her eyes darting to her bedroom door, which was open. “I get it, Emma. I do. I’ve been in your position before. Seeing other people happy while you’re heart is breaking. But know I’m here for you, okay? It's my job as your best friend to be there.” She glanced to her door once more as she stood to gently close it. “Are you okay though? You disappeared on me.”  
She decided then to not go into her date with Dani the previous night. She had a lot of fun with the other woman, sharing popcorn and a movie at a theater, the night ending with Dani’s lips brushing against her cheek. It had made Regina’s entire body tingle, but as her eyes had closed, she had only pictured Emma’s face next to hers. 

“Yeah, I’m okay. I think I just needed to think through a few things.” Emma said as she started her car and pulled from the school she tutored at. “Thank you for worrying, Gina. It means a lot.” A blush tinted the blonde’s cheeks, realizing she had called Regina by the name she usually teased her with. But she could practically hear Regina’s smile through the phone.

“It’s what I’m here for, Em-ma.” She responded, glancing at her phone as it vibrated in her hands. She sighed, a mix of happiness and dread. “Dani wants to see me again.” She said, her voice steady as she tried to make sense of her mixed emotions. 

“Are you gonna? Did you have fun with her?” Emma asked her, pushing down that small bubble of jealousy that threatened to pop. She really did want Regina to be happy, and if it meant sacrificing a sliver of her happiness, she would do anything. 

“I did…” Regina said slowly. “I think I’ll give her another shot. She was sweet and polite. And I think we meshed together well.” She said, not sure if she was convincing herself or Emma. 

“Well, good then. You deserve someone to treat you right.” Emma said brightly, trapping the phone between her shoulder and ear as she drove, having to keep both free for shifting. “Hey, wanna do another movie night tonight? We can watch another one of your cheesy rom-coms.”

Regina huffed into the phone, glancing at the stacks of books on her desk. “I really would love to, but I’ve got so much studying to do. But I promise we can do it later this week. I’ve got a big test coming up Monday.” 

“That’s fine. I should probably be studying too. Finals are in two months and everyone is already scrambling.” The blonde’s face contorting into disgust. “I’m not exactly looking forward to it either, but it’s a little early to be panicking.” 

“Agreed. But some of us do like to be prepared.” Regina said, feigning hurt. “It’s not my fault that you’re always procrastinating.” She found herself slipping back into the teasing nature of the two, glad that their small quarrel was over with. 

Emma let out a short laugh, pulling up to her new, smaller, apartment. “Right, I’ll let you go, Regina. Get to studying. We can talk later.” 

“Bye, Em-ma. Make sure you’re actually studying.” She said, grinning as she hung up the phone.  
———-

Regina was looking across the table at the older brunette, the rush of alcohol coursing through her veins as she laughed lightly at a joke Dani had just told. 

She liked Dani, but there was something missing. She had been thinking about Emma all night. She had repeatedly kicked herself for doing it, but she was undeniably in love with the blonde who happened to also be over 3,000 miles away. She had decided to give Dani a second chance, even if there wasn’t that spark. It took effort to laugh at Dani’s jokes, and she had to force herself to pay attention. 

Her mind was wandering to her conversations with Emma over the last week. The blonde had seemed short, distracted. They had never rescheduled their movie night, and they had only talked on the phone once. She was hoping the blonde had finally come to her senses about studying, but she knew that likely wasn’t the case. 

“You okay, Mills?” The girl asked, pulling Regina from her thoughts. “Do you want to dance?” She asked, her blue eyes darting to the floor of the club they were currently at.

Regina had no idea why she had agreed to a club. They were the last place she usually wanted to go, but the idea of letting loose for one night and getting drunk enough to...Her thoughts trailed off as she nodded, slipping from the bar stool. She pulled down the way too short dress her friend Kat had loaned her, slipping her hand into Dani’s as they made their way to the dance floor. She let out a slight “hmph” as Dani pulled her against her, Regina’s back pressed to her front. She shuddered slightly as Dani’s hands wound around her waist, the woman’s breath against her neck. She pushed aside all thoughts of Emma as she began to rock her hips against Dani, her inebriation pushing her along. 

She was having fun, and dancing like this was turning her on. She was seeing a new side of the other woman tonight, a woman who was a little more comfortable around her. Regina turned around in Dani’s arms, wrapping her arms around her neck as she swayed her hips to the beat. 

Once the song was over, Regina pulled back slightly, her eyes darting to the bar. “How about another drink?” She suggested, a flush in her cheeks from the alcohol and dancing. It was well after 11 by now, the club was beginning to fill even more, people bumping into them left and right. 

“Do you want to go back to my place instead?” Dani asked, her hands gripping Regina’s waist slightly, causing both of them to inhale sharply. 

“I’d love to.” Regina said lowly, stepping into Dani’s personal space once more to brush her lips against the older woman’s. She took one of the older woman’s hands again as she dragged her to the bar to pay their tab, Dani pressing herself against Regina’s back again, a warm feeling settling low in Regina’s belly. She wanted this, even if it was to get over the blonde on the other side of the country. 

Once they were outside and an Uber was called, Regina found herself pressed up against the brick wall of the bar, her lips melded with Dani’s. Her hands found purchase in short, dark hair, pulling lightly as tongues battled for dominance. Her entire body was on fire with need, a fire to be touched again. Her biological need took over from there, her hands now going to grip the lapels of Dani’s blazer. She tugged the single button, the jacket popping easily to reveal the dark grey button up under it. A hand on her wrist stopped her from tugging the shirt from her jeans, Dani chuckling into her mouth. 

“If I knew you wanted me that bad, I would have just taken you to my place.” Dani mumbled, her pupils blown as she stared down at the younger woman. She pushed herself off the wall, turning as their Uber pulled up. Dani made her way to the car, but paused as she turned around to see if Regina was following her. 

But Regina was frozen against the wall, one hand reaching up to touch her kiss-bruised lips, her eyes closed. When she finally did open them, her vision was blurry, she hadn’t even realized she was crying. “I’m sorry, Dani. I can’t-“ she choked on her words, her hand now shakily being pulled away from her lips. 

Dani frowned as she rushed back to Regina, cupping her face with her hands. “What’s wrong? Did I say something wrong? I assumed, didn’t I? Gods, I shouldn’t have said that.” Dani ran a hand through her hair, stepping away from Regina. “I’m sorry if I pressured you, Regina. I didn’t mean to, I just-“

Regina held up her hand, effectively cutting off the woman’s rambling. “It isn’t you, Dani. You said everything right. I want to sleep with you, but I just can’t.” Regina sighed defeatedly as she leaned back against the wall, her eyes downcast. “I’m in love with someone else and I can’t do that to you. You’re too good to be strung along.” 

Dani frowned deeply, but then nodded as her face relaxed. “I should have known. You’ve been kinda distant tonight. I hope whoever she is knows how much you love her.” She said awkwardly, her hand scratching the back of her neck. “I’ll call you another Uber, if ya want.” She said, pulling her phone from her pocket, but Regina stopped her. 

“It’s okay, you paid for my drinks. The least I can do is pay for my own ride.” A horn sounded from behind her as the Uber driver they were supposed to be taking waved a hand at them. “I’ll let you get home...I’m sorry, Dani.” 

The woman just shrugged and leaned over, placing a light kiss on Regina’s cheek. “Call me if things don’t work out with you two.” She winked and turned, getting into the Uber. 

When she was out of sight, Regina let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. Now to deal with what this meant for her and Emma. She was in love with her best friend, but she wasn’t sure if she would ever tell Emma.


	5. Chapter 5

Emma desperately tries not to think of Regina going on her date tonight. It had felt like a rock had been in her stomach since the brunette had told her she wouldn’t be by her phone that night, that Dani was taking her to a club. She had played her role as the supportive best friend, even going as far as to help Regina pick out the short, red leather dress she was wearing. 

_ ’It should have been me.’  _ She thought bitterly as she grinned at her screen, watching Regina spin to show off the dress, trying to keep the butterflies in her stomach under control. She looked absolutely beautiful, the red dress hugging her curves perfectly. 

“Thanks, Emma. You’re such an amazing friend. Truly.” Regina said as she sat back down at her desk, pulling her makeup mirror and makeup closer to her to begin to add a dark smokey eye. 

Emma just smiled back at Regina, shaking her head. “It’s no problem Regina. I’m gonna let you go...You’ve gotta finish getting ready and I’ve gotta head out soon. Ruby is coming over to study.” Ruby was Emma’s other best friend. They had met in their class and immediately became friends. The girls complimented each other, Ruby’s wild nature balancing out Emma’s more laid back one. They had gone out a few times over the last few months, mainly to a laid back gay bar where they got their drinks for free and flirted with women. Emma hadn’t taken anyone home, but the same wasn’t to be said for Ruby. Perfectly balanced. 

Emma said goodbye and closed her laptop, slumping back against her bed again as she ran a hand through her hair. Ruby would be there in an hour, but instead of studying the girls were watching a movie and drinking. Ruby’s boyfriend had dumped her, and Emma had forced the younger brunette to come over and drink away her pain. 

She wasn’t sure why she had lied to Regina. They had only been friends for two months, she didn’t owe Regina anything but the truth. But she knew she didn’t want Regina worrying about Emma getting too drunk again. 

‘Worry. As if she would.’ Emma thought, groaning out loud. She knew her feelings for the brunette were inappropriate, especially because Regina was likely dating someone now. She rolled over onto her stomach, grabbing her phone before opening pictures Regina had sent her, a few silly mirror selfies of her in her dress. She groaned again and buried her head in her pillow, figuring a way to get over Regina. 

\-------

Emma was sprawled out on the sofa next to Ruby, who was ranting away about Billy and how much of a jerk he was when her phone rang. Ruby stopped mid-sentence when she saw Regina’s contact name. 

“Who’s ‘The Queen’?” She asked, cocking her head slightly in her drunken state. 

“R’gina. You know the girl I”ve been talking to who lives in fucking Maine? The one I’m completely head over heels in love with?” She slurred, the haze of the alcohol slowing her thought process down. She sloppily answered the phone pulling it up to her ear. “This better not be a butt dial. I don’t wanna hear you fucki-”

“Are you drunk?” Regina chuckled, cutting her off. She was leaning against the column on her porch, the beautiful white mansion that was her home looming above her. “I thought you and Ruby were studying?” She asked, not trying to suppress the smile on her face. She knew Emma was endearing when she was drunk, one of the qualities she enjoyed. 

“We did study! But we got bored.” Emma said, laughing. “It isn’t my fault chemistry is boring. Shouldn’t you be with Dani?” Emma asked, glancing up to see Ruby hoist herself off the couch to make another drink. 

“Dani and I both agreed we weren’t fitting together. It was in both of our best interests that we didn’t drag this out.” Regina said, over exaggerating a snobby tone to her voice. “She just wasn’t what I was looking for.” She admitted, sighing softly. 

“What are you looking for?” Emma almost whispered, her heart soaring over the fact that Regina wasn’t tied to anyone. She knew she shouldn’t have been so happy about it, but she still couldn’t help the feeling warming it’s way through her body. 

“How about you sleep this off and I’ll call you tomorrow? Mother is expecting me home soon. I just wanted to call you and tell you what happened, I guess.” Regina let her head fall back, thumping against the wooden pillar. “Have fun with Ruby, Em. We can talk tomorrow.” She said softly, kindly. Far to kindly to be saying it to just a friend. 

Emma sighed dejectedly, but was lifted again when she realized Regina had called her to tell her that her date hadn’t worked out. That Regina cared enough to tell her, and that it seemed the older woman had more news because she wanted to talk again tomorrow. “Alright, fine. I’ll go. I’ll have a shot for your bad luck.” She teased, saying goodbye before hanging up. 

Ruby plopped back down on the couch, her eyes fixed on Emma. “Girl you look like you just got told you won the lottery. Tea. Now.” 

Emma grinned and recalled their short phone conversation. “So I think there might be a chance for us, Rubes. And if there is, I graduate next summer and that means I could move there and we could be together and we could buy a house and-” 

Ruby quickly cut off Emma as she threw her head back and laughed. “You’ve got it bad girl, really really bad.” 

Emma laughed and raised her glass once more, clinking it to Ruby’s. “I’ll drink to that.” 

\--------

The blonde groaned, pulling a pillow over her face as morning light streamed in through her window, her curtains had just been thrown open by Ruby. 

“Wakey wakey, sleeping beauty.” The brunette said, way to chipper for having been overly intoxicated the night before. “It’s almost 11. You need to get your ass up.” She said, yanking the covers off Emma, who screeched and tried grabbing them again. “Jesus, Emma! Warn a girl next time!” Ruby said, slapping her hand over her eyes. 

Emma hadn’t exactly told her friend that she often slept completely naked when she got drunk. Her clothing always ended up in a heap on the floor when she climbed into bed. “You didn’t tell me you were barging in here while I was sleeping!” She was very much hungover, and very much grumpy. “Get out!” She said, pointing to the door, a playful scowl on her face. “Unless you want me to parade around in my birthday suit?” She asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“PLEASE DO NOT!” Ruby shouted, slapping a hand over her eyes again as she manically laughed, running from the room. 

Emma rolled her eyes as the door shut before falling back on her bed. She picked up her phone from her bedside table, pleased to find she managed to plug it in the night before. There were three texts from Regina, a smile playing across her lips as she read them. 

**-9:15am “I know you’re probably still passed out, but I just finished this fic and I thought you’d enjoy it.” ~attached link~**

**-10:02am “Are you still sleeping?”**

**-10:38am “I wish I could sleep this late. Wake up. I’m bored. Work is slow.**

Emma laughed and shook her head as she got up to dig through her drawers for a pair of jeans and t-shirt. 

**I’m awake, I’m awake. Impatient, damn.**

**It’s not my fault you got drunk and decided to sleep in :P**

**Did you just use an emoji? You really must be bored. Mal not around today?**

**Thankfully not. She’s down in Boston for some book convention. She’s a fan of romance novels and I guess one of her favorite authors just came out with a new one.**

**Sounds exciting. What did you want to talk to me about?**

**I’d rather not do it over text. Can we video chat when I get home tonight?**

**You’re killing me, Mills. The anticipation might actually kill me.**

**You’ll survive. How’s your hangover?**

**Deadly. I’m never drinking again.**

**I doubt that.**

Emma laughed at her phone, now curled up on the couch with a cup of coffee, mindlessly scrolling through Netflix. She wanted to know what Regina was going to talk to her about, and the anticipation was causing her some anxiety. She was off today, no school and no work. Saturdays were usually her cleaning days, but she was too distracted to even think about doing it. Her apartment was clean enough. Ruby had left while Emma was making her coffee, something about Billy wanting to talk. Emma had rolled her eyes on the brunette, knowing the cycle. They would have a huge fight, drinking would ensue, and they’d get right back together. This had to be the third or fourth time in the last six months. Apparently their makeup sex was so mindblowing that Ruby “couldn’t help it”. 

**What time are you off?** She finally replied after finishing up her coffee and bringing it to the sink. 

**Impatient, are we? It’s nothing bad, Emma. Just something I’ve been sitting on for a few weeks.**

**You know me, Gina. I overthink. It’s what I do.**

Across the country, Regina was leaned behind the checkout counter, her teeth worrying her lower lip. She wanted to tell Emma she had feelings for her, but over text seemed too impersonal for such a monumental revelation. Something that could make or break their friendship. She was sure Emma felt something for her after their tiff with Dani. But what she wasn’t sure of was if Emma would want to pursue anything. Hell, she wasn’t even sure she wanted to. 3,000 miles was a long way. But there were always planes and trains and cars. Regina scoffed to herself as she opened Emma’s contact, pressing the call button. 

“I thought you were working?” Came the blonde’s answer, her voice bringing a smile to Regina’s lips. 

“I am, but I’d rather not have you sit around panicking all day. I know you too well, Emma.” Her teeth found her lower lip again, her own anxiety bubbling up. 

Emma noticed the pause and the slightly raised tone of Regina’s voice. “Are you okay? Did something happen?” She asked, sitting up on her couch. 

“Everything is fine. More than fine, actually. But I want you to be completely honest with me, Em. Why did you really shut me out when I told you about my date with Dani? I have some suspicions, but I want to hear it from you.” 

Emma swallowed thickly, falling back into the cushions. “I told you why. I wasn’t over Lily and I was jealous.” 

“Jealous of who?” Regina asked, doubt evident in her voice. 

It was a moment before Emma replied, her voice a mere whisper as she rushed out the answer. “Dani.” 

Regina’s mouth fell open slightly, almost not believing Emma had given in so easily, admitting that she had been jealous of Regina’s love interest. She stuttered slightly over her next words, her heart pounding in her chest. “I thought so. Do you want to know why I ended things with her?” She asked, taking a deep breath as her anxiety quelled slightly. “Because she wasn’t you. I can’t get you out of my head, Emma. You brighten my day more than you realize. I look forward to talking to you every single day. Dani could never compare to that. I compared everything she did to you. She couldn’t make me smile like you do. I know it was still early for us, but you came into my life and lit up my world again, Emma. I think I’m falling in love with you.” She blurted out the last part after a moment of silence through the phone, her heart racing again. She was prepared for rejection, even if it wasn’t warranted. 

“I’m falling in love with you too, Regina.” Emma said, her voice cracking. “Gods, you have no idea how glad I am to hear you say that. I was convinced you’d never feel the same way.” 

“Of course I do, Em. You’re my best friend and I want to make this work. I know I’ve said I don’t do long distance relationships, but I think this could be worth it.”

“You really think we can do this?” Emma asked, her voice full of hope. All she wanted was Regina. It all seemed like a dream, that the older woman actually wanted her, and wanted to make things work. 

“Of course I do. I mean, you can’t deny we’ve practically been dating this entire time.” She teased, her body visually relaxing as she slumped forward against the counter. 

Emma smirked, her mind jumping into the gutter. “Oh no, baby. You would know if we were dating.” Her voice dropped lower, her smirk turning into a grin. “Just wait and see, Mills. Just wait and see.” 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one is NSFW! Fair warning ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:   
> I’m so sorry this took so long! I was having a hard time finding my muse! But I’m back and hopefully better than ever! Enjoy this chapter, loves. I know I enjoyed writing it!

“I missed you today.” Regina said as she answered the phone call. They had officially been dating for a month, and a lot had changed. They hadn’t said the L word yet, but their relationship was progressing quickly. 

Regina had taken a leap that afternoon, sending Emma a picture of her laid out on her bed, her red lace bra and matching panties tantalizingly covering very little. They had been hard core flirting, talking about kissing each other and holding each other. But it hadn’t gotten to the point of picture sending or actual dirty talk. She admitted to herself that she was sexually frustrated. It wasn’t just that the blonde turned her on to no end, but their chemistry together was intense even if they were 3,000 miles apart. Especially because they were 3,000 miles apart. 

“I missed you too, babe.” Emma said with a big smile, even though she was exhausted from a full day of tutoring. “I haven’t been able to get you out of my head. That picture today…” she trailed off, chewing on her lower lip for a moment. “You are so sexy, Gina.” 

Regina’s cheeks flushed red as she chewed her lower lip, the sudden confidence of earlier dwindling. “I’m glad you liked it. I loved taking it for you.” 

“You almost made me fly out to you, I more than liked it. I’d kill to be there with you right now.” Emma said unabashedly, her smile turning into a smirk. A deep ache had settled between her thighs almost all day, the image flashing through her mind at less than appropriate moments. 

Regina cocked an eyebrow at that, the corner of her mouth twitching. “Oh? Is that so? And what would you do if you were here?” Regina teased, more as a joke than an actual invite to answer the question. She leaned back against her pillows, settling down into a comfortable position. 

Emma swallowed loudly, almost groaning out loud. She was leaning back on her couch, a beer in her hand that she had grabbed as soon as she was through the front door. “Oh, um. Do you really want to know?” Emma asked, her mouth drying at the thoughts of telling Regina what she really wanted to do. 

“I definitely do, Em-ma.” Regina said lowly, crossing one leg over the other. “If you’d like to. There’s no pressure.” She added after a moment of silence. She heard a shuffling in the background as Emma laid back on the couch, blonde hair spilling behind her. 

“Well, I think I would start with kissing you.” She said for a moment, her eyes closed as she pictured Regina laid out on the bed. “I’d kiss you slowly. Enough to leave you wanting more.” Emma husked, lost in the fantasy. She listened to a quiet Regina on the other end for a moment, smirking to herself as she heard her breathing become shallow. “I’d be hovering over you, straddling your thigh.” She chewed her lower lip. She had never had phone sex before, a slight insecurity bubbling up her chest. “Regina?” She asked, the other side still quiet. 

“Keep going.” Came a breathy reply, Emma’s eyes snapping open as she heard Regina’s voice through her phone. 

“Are you t-touching yourself?” Emma stammered, her mind suddenly hazing. 

“Is that okay?” 

“Gods, yes.” Emma groaned, sitting up to pull her sweater over her head, living her in a tank top and jeans. “I’d kiss from your lips to your jaw, nipping at the skin under your ear. My fingers would trail up your side to cup your breast, massaging it.” She heard a soft moan of approval, clenching her thighs together. 

“What are you wearing?” Regina asked, laughing slightly at the cliche question. 

Emma chuckled at the question, looking down at herself. “White tank top and blue skinny jeans. My usual.” 

“Are you on your bed?” 

“Couch. Why?” 

“Go lay on your bed. I want you to get comfortable.” 

Emma practically threw herself off the couch and walked to her bedroom, keeping the phone cradled between her shoulder and ear. “What are you wearing? She breathed as she undid her jeans and stripped them off, frowning slightly at the dark blue boy shorts. A perk of dating online was not having to wear sexy underwear a majority of the time, but the sudden thought of teasing pictures turned her on to the idea of wearing them again. 

“I’m in my silk bathrobe, still have on the red lace I sent you earlier. My robe is untied and open.” Regina said, her fingers ghosting up and down her stomach, a teasing touch for what was to come. 

Emma fell onto her bed, her tank top now gone. “You are an absolute dream.” Emma said, her eyes closed as she pictured Regina again. “I wouldn’t be able to resist running my tongue along your collarbone.” Realistically, she should be feeling embarrassed for voicing what she was, but her mind was occupied in the moment. Her fingers trailed over her own collarbone, shivering at the light touch. “Are you touching yourself?” Emma asked, her voice low with wonton desire. 

Regina could only hum back as her own fingers traced a pattern over her chest, imagining Emma’s lips were teasing her skin. 

“Good girl.” Emma praised, the words slipping from her lips as before she could stop herself. “I want you to take off your bra and tease yourself.” Emma said, her face now flushed with arousal as she undid her own bra and set her phone on speaker, setting it next to her. 

Regina obliged without much thought, feeling herself getting wetter with Emma’s praise and demand. She laid back down in the pillows, now only clad in her panties. She began to run her fingertips between her breasts, her eyes closed as the featherlight touches shot sparks down her back. Running her fingers along the underside of her breasts, her breathing became more labored as her body begged for more. She gave in and pinched her nipples, mewling as her body reacted positively. 

Emma smirked and bit her lip as Regina’s moan came through the speaker, her own hands mirroring the action. “Harder, baby.” Emma breathed, her own eyes rolling back as she harshly pinched her nipples, the sudden sensation causing her to moan lowly. “Touch yourself over your panties.” Emma directed, her hand mirroring what Regina was about to do. “I’m so wet for you.” She breathed, feeling the damp spot on her own underwear. 

“I’m soaked.” Came Regina’s choked reply as her hips bucked up slightly as her fingers came in contact with her swollen clit over her panties. It was pure torture hearing Emma’s own harsh breathing on the phone, the image of the blonde sprawled out on the bed while Regina climbed in between her legs to find out just how wet she was. Her fingers sped up as her back arched slightly off the bed. She couldn’t ever see herself begging, but she was just about to when Emma finally spoke again. 

“Take off your panties. Imagine your fingers are mine. I want to hear you come.” Emma said as she peeled her own underwear from her body, her fingers sliding through her dripping folds as she moaned. “Fuck, I wish you were here.” She breathlessly said as her slick fingers circled her clit. 

Regina quickly rid herself of the ruined material, not bothering to kick the panties from her ankle before she had two fingers buried inside of herself. “Emma, gods, you feel so good.” She moaned, setting a torturously slow pace for herself. 

Emma’s fingers quickened as she embarrassingly rose quickly toward her peak, her hips gyrating as she screwed her eyes shut. “Are you fucking yourself?” Emma asked, slipping a single digit into herself as she let up on her clit, afraid she would come too soon. 

“Mhm.” Regina moaned, her left hand coming up to play with her breasts as she tried to push her right fingers in deeper, the heel of her hand grinding into her clit. 

Only the sounds of their harsh breathing and occasional moans came through the speaker over the next minute before Regina gasped, her orgasm crashing through her. She saw stars as her back arched, a drawn out “Emma” leaving her lips in a moan. 

Emma comes undone right after Regina, her entire body tingling and convulsing slightly as she curses loudly and collapses back on the bed. After a few seconds, Emma can hear a quiet giggle over the phone. Turning on her side toward her phone, she began to catch her breath, a wide grin on her face. “That was amazing, Gina.” She said, burying her face in her pillow. 

“I love you.” Came the quiet reply, Regina’s own heart stopping in her chest. They hadn’t said those exact words yet, even if they had implied it when they first got together a month ago. There was silence on the other end, which caused Regina’s heart to seize again. “Emma?” She asked after a moment. She let out another quiet chuckle as a soft snore came through her phone. She laid her head down on her own pillow, the call still connected as she pulled a pillow to her chest, pulling the covers over her body and fell asleep imagining Emma was in her arms.


	7. Chapter 7

Everything was wrong. Her life turned upside down. Her phone lay silent on her bedside table after hours of tossing and turning, unable to sleep. 

Regina had texted Emma earlier in the evening, called numerous times, left many voicemails. But she had been shut out. 

Their first real argument in their four month relationship. They had made plans for Regina to fly out to San Francisco for Christmas break. The two of them would finally meet. But Cora had gotten wind of the plan, not of Emma, but just that Regina had bought a plane ticket out there and had forbidden her daughter from going. Something about staying with the family for appearances. Regina has begged and pleaded with her mother to let her go, but had been forced to cancel the ticket while Cora watched. She had spent the day apologizing to Emma, promising to visit her for spring break. Emma had begrudgingly agreed, and their moods were lifted again after a very long, and very hot Skype call. 

Until Graham had showed up for the Christmas dinner. Cora had been trying to set up Graham and Regina for years. Ever since the two turned 16. Graham had been one of Regina’s friends through school, the only one who knew about her attraction to the fairer sex from a young age. He had been something close to a best friend, but of course her mother wanted it to be more. 

~The Christmas Party~

Regina leaned back against the couch, her third glass of wine in her hand. She was so close to grabbing a glass of the apple cider sitting on the mantle when a familiar body sat next to her on the couch. “We have to make this stop.” She said, leaning her head on Graham’s shoulder. “I can’t take anymore of my mother throwing you at me. No offense.” 

Graham chuckled lightly next to her, taking a sip of his own whiskey. Regina visibly wrinkled her nose at it, more out of wishful thinking. It was “unladylike” to drink anything but wine. “I know Reggie, but you’ll be out of here soon. One and a half more years and you’ll be out from under her belt and free to do whatever you want.” 

A sudden plan formed in Regina’s brain as she lifted her head, frowning slightly. “What if we lied?” 

“What are you talking about?” Graham asked, looking down at Regina. 

“What if we pretended to be in a relationship! I mean, if we put on an act, pretended to be together. I could move out, gain the freedom I so desperately need and we could continue seeing our actual partners in secret.” She beamed, not being able to find a single flaw in her plan through her tipsy haze. 

“Do you really think it would work? I don’t think your mother would fall for something like that out of the blue.” He said, narrowing his eyes at Regina as she sat up excitedly. 

“We could say we’ve been dating for a year, but hiding it because of school! I could say I didn’t want mother to think I was being distracted. But with you getting your law degree last year and with me graduating in a few years, I don’t think she’ll object!”

“And what about Emma? Do you think she’ll agree to this? I know I wouldn’t be too thrilled.” He said, cocking an eyebrow at the woman nestled into his side again. 

“Emma knows how horrid mother can be. I think she’d be happy that I found a way to get out, even if it means faking a relationship with someone else.” Alarm bells rang in the back of her head, knowing Emma was already slightly insecure about their relationship. Regina had spent many hours texting and reassuring Emma that she wanted her and only her, while Emma had done the same for her. Slight insecurities were normal in a relationship like theirs, but with Emma’s traumatic past, Regina had to be vigilant. She didn’t mind, not the slightest. 

“If you think so...Do you think we should tell them first?” He asked, placing his arm around her shoulders. 

Regina shrugged as she leaned into his side again, melting into his familiar smell. 

“Regina Mills!” 

Regina cringed and moved away from Graham, sitting up straight once more. “Mother.” She said, coolly, turning her head to greet her mother. 

Cora raised a questioning eyebrow at the two of them, then turned up her nose. “I would have preferred if you didn’t throw yourself over each other with your families present. I have known for a while, so spare me the lies.” 

“Yes, mother.” Regina said, feeling oddly chastised for actually doing nothing. She faced forward again, sighing softly. “If only it wasn’t rude to turn on the television.” She said as her mother exited the room, rolling her eyes. 

Graham held out his whiskey, flashing her a toothy grin. “I won’t tell if you don’t.”

Regina took a gulp from the glass, her eyes screwing shut as the harsh liquor slid down her throat. “I’ll need about 5 more of those.” She said, feeling her phone vibrate next to her. She grinned softly as she saw Emma’s name, excusing herself so she could go to the study and talk in peace. 

“Hello my love. Merry Christmas.” She said, settling in the chair behind the desk. 

“Merry Christmas, Regina!” Came Emma’s reply, and Regina could hear Ruby shout the same in the back. 

“Are you having a good Christmas? It’s snowing here.” Regina said as she spun the chair around, looking out the large bay windows in her mother’s study. 

“Hold on babe.” Emma said, removing herself to a quiet room too. She was with Ruby and her grandmother, and a few other of their family members in northern Washington. “It’s snowing here too! I was so excited. It’s been years since I’ve seen a white Christmas. I miss you.” 

“I miss you too, my love.” Regina chewed her bottom lip for a moment, debating on telling Emma her plan now or later. She knew it would be best to tell Emma as soon as possible, but she feared she would ruin Christmas. “Can we talk about something serious for a moment? I think I’ve found a way to get away from my mother.” 

Emma perked up at that for a moment, sitting down on the bed in the room she had slipped into. “You did!? How did you manage that?” 

“Well…” and Regina began her story of how her mother had already suspected that her and Graham were together, despite both of them being involved with the same sex. How she believed if she and Graham started a fake relationship, her mother might allow her to move out and in with her “boyfriend”. 

Emma cleared her throat on the other line, her brow deeply furrowed. “What’s gonna happen when she expects you two to be engaged? You know your mother, better than I do. If you’ve said you’ve been together for a year, won’t she expect something more?”

“That’s why I have the perfect excuse of still being in school. We could get fake engaged for a while and after I graduate claim that it just wouldn’t work out and by then, you’ll be in Boston and I could move there for a fresh start.” Regina said excitedly, believing her plan was perfect. 

“So you want to hide us for two years?” Came Emma’s quiet reply after a few moments. Her voice raised a little bit, she couldn’t help the hurt bubbling up in her. “You get to play happy couple with a man while I’m three thousand miles away, just expected to go along with this plan.”

“Emma, sweetheart, it’s the only logical thing I could come up with. And you could actually come here when Graham and I get our own place. I thought you’d be excited about this.” Regina said, frowning deeply. She could hear how hurt Emma was, she hadn’t expected that at all. 

“Well, I’m not excited about it. I know Graham is like your brother, but I’m not going to be your dirty little secret for two years, Regina.” 

“You won’t be!” Regina interjected, leaning her elbows against the desk as she ran a hand through her hair. “Listen, I don’t want to fight about this. Take some time to think about it. I know we’ve both been drinking, so this may seem like a great idea, or it may seem like a disaster once we’re sober. Just please, Emma. Please think about it. I’m doing this for us.” 

Emma sighed softly into the phone, shaking her head. “I’ll think about it. Give me some time.” She paused, feeling a weight in her chest push down on her heart. “I love you, Regina. Give me space to think about it. I’ll talk to you later.” She choked on the last words, not realizing she was crying. She hung up the phone after Regina said goodbye, falling back on the bed. She was facing an internal conflict like none she ever had before. While she wanted the best for Regina, a hidden relationship was never going to work. Not for two years while her love had a beard hanging onto her at every moment. She hated that term, and everything that came with it. She didn’t want to hate Graham, but the thought of him playing happy couple with Regina made her stomach churn. 

Emma huffed and picked herself up off the bed, heading out to grab more drinks with Ruby and forget about trying to figure this out for now. 

-  
“She said she’d think about it.” Regina said as she sat back on the couch next to Graham, her face somber. “I don’t think she likes the idea of it and that scares me. I really hope she comes around.” She said as she took the glass of amber liquid from Graham again, throwing back the rest of it. “But you’ve been my friend for years. She should trust you.” 

“Maybe that isn’t it, Reggie. Maybe she doesn’t want to hide. It’s only logical. That girl loves you. Imagine if she had to get a boyfriend and keep you two a secret.” 

Regina shrugged, nestling herself into Graham again as her heart sank lower. “I just wish I didn’t have to, you know? If mother found out I was dating a woman, she’d lose it. She already ruined one relationship, I don’t need her to ruin another.” She sat up, screwing up her face in a mocking manner. “A politician cannot have a tainted background. Illicit lesbian affairs are the worst of the worst, Regina. You must keep your record clean and date wonderful men with power.” She rolled her eyes, sinking into the couch again. “And it’s perfect with you being future sheriff. Future mayor and future sheriff. Straight from a novella.” 

“Why don’t we dance? Get you another drink and your mind off everything.” Graham said, standing and holding out his hand to hoist her up. “You need to have fun, Reggie. It’s Christmas. Wipe that frown off your face and dance with me.” 

Regina sighed as she allowed him to pull her to the large dining room where her mother had set up her speakers that were playing music, a few other people of power swaying with their partners. Regina stepped into Graham, looping her arms around his neck, and his around her waist. 

As they began to sway to the music, unbeknownst to the two, a “friend” of Regina’s had snapped a picture of them, posting it to social media. 

“And the two lovebirds have finally emerged from hiding. So happy for my besties, years in the making”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double upload today! My muse is raging! Please enjoy, and be kind to me. I promise I have a plan!

“What the fuck did I do!?” Emma cried, burying her face in her pillow again. 

Ruby sat on the bed next to her, curling her feet up under her. “Ems, it was a mistake. Don’t be so hard on yourself.” 

Emma’s head snapped up, a look of fury on her face. “A mistake!? A mistake! Ruby! I slept with someone else!” She screeched, a new wave of tears rolling down her face. “I’ve fucked everything up! She’s never going to talk to me again, Ruby. I broke her trust after she’s been reassuring me she’d never break mine!” 

“She’s the one who was getting cozy with a guy in the first place.” Ruby muttered, averting her eyes from Emma. She wanted to make her best friend feel better, but she had no idea how. 

Emma’s lower lip trembled as she fell back into her pillow, staring up at the ceiling. “He’s like her brother. But she had a plan and I wasn’t okay with it. This is my fault, Ruby. I did this to us.” She said as she felt the tears leak from the corner of her eyes. 

~The previous night~

Emma stared at her phone, her teeth clenched. Regina had been tagged in a photo. Her arms were slung around Graham’s neck, head resting on his chest. His hands were on the small of her back, their bodies pressed together. 

“Years in the making” 

Had Regina been lying to her? There was a slight possibility, but only minuscule. Emma tossed her phone onto the couch, abruptly standing, startling Ruby. 

“Woah there, tiger. You okay?” The brunette asked with a cock of her head. 

“I need a drink, or five.” Emma said, stalking toward the kitchen. Their Christmas party was mostly Ruby’s family, but the booze was flowing. Emma now understood where Ruby got her party tendencies. 

“Shit sorry!” Emma cursed as she bumped into someone, the man turning around to face her. 

“It’s no problem.” He said, a soft smile on his face. “Hey, you’re Red’s friend, aren’t you?” He asked, leaning against the counter against the counter next to the fridge. 

“Red? Oh! Ruby. Yeah.” Emma almost tripped over her words as she reached into the fridge to grab another wine cooler, pouring it into her glass and topping it with vodka. 

The man raised an eyebrow at her but chose not to comment on her beverage choice, instead held out his hand. “Neal. I’ve heard a lot about you from Ruby. She’s my cousin.” 

Emma eyed his hand for a moment, then shook it. “It’s nice to meet you Neal. I’ve heard nothing about you.” She said as she took a gulp of her drink, wrinkling her nose at the harshness of it. She put a lot more vodka in it than she planned, but decided to go with it. 

They began small talk, mainly about school and what live was like further south. They both found themselves sitting on the couch, Ruby joining in on their conversation after a while. 

They laughed and talked for a few hours, the alcohol coursing through Emma’s veins as she finished her third drink, bordering on drunk. Ruby announced she was going to bed as Emma poured herself a fourth drink, the brunette leaning over to warn Emma to take it easy. 

“I’ll be fine, Rubes. I’ve drank more before.” She slurred, rolling her eyes playfully. “I’ll see you in the morning.” 

If Emma had been completely honest with herself, she would have stopped after that drink. If she had known what would happen, she would have gone to bed with Ruby, but she didn’t. And she’d regret it. 

~

She awoke the next morning groggy, sore and very hungover. 

As she turned over, she nearly leapt out of bed at the feeling of someone next to her. She inhaled sharply as tears stung her eyes, slowly removing herself from the bed. She searched for her clothes on the floor as tears began to fall, her stomach lurching at the sight of Neal in the bed, his naked body half covered with the sheet. She threw on her clothes as she began to cry, trying to hold back her choked sobs. 

She heard shuffling behind her as Neal sat up, but she refused to turn around. 

“Hey, where ya goin’?” Neal’s gravelly voice broke the silence as she pulled her t-shirt on over her head. 

“This was a mistake, Neal. We were drunk and it’s never happening again. Forget about this, forget about me.” She said as she rushed from the room and down the stairs, out into the frigid morning air. She threw herself onto one of the chairs on the back deck, her sons finally wracking her body as she cried. 

~present~

“She’ll never forgive me. It was a drunken mistake, but I didn’t stop his advances. I wanted it. I wanted to feel like I was the only thing that mattered in the moment. I did this to us.” Emma rambled, turning over on her stomach again. 

“You’ll have to talk to her eventually, Emma. Even if it’s just to tell her and give her closure. You can’t ghost her.” Ruby said sternly, frowning at her friend. 

“I know I need to, Ruby. It’s just...I can’t. I don’t want her to hate me.” Emma said as she sat up. “I’m scared. I love her so much, Ruby. What if she doesn’t forgive me? She’s probably had drunken mistakes too…” she wiped her hand under her eyes, finally scooting back to lean against the headboard. “I know it’s already been two days, but I just can’t do it. I’ve fucked up big time.” 

Ruby sighed and moved so that she was sat next to Emma, pulling her into a hug. “I know, Ems. But you need to. If she hates you, we’ll drink until you forget about her. We’ll go on and continue our lives and you’ll graduate in May. Maybe you’ll meet someone new by then.” 

Emma rested her head against Ruby’s shoulder, sighing deeply as she glanced at her phone on the nightstand. It was ringing, obviously Regina trying her again. Instead of ignoring it as she had been the last two days, she answered. 

“Emma?” Came the shocked reply, Regina bolting upright on the couch. “Emma? Baby are you there?” She asked again, gripping the phone tightly against her ear. 

“H-hi.” Emma said, a new flood of tears wetting her face. “I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring you.” She said as she sniffled. 

“What’s wrong? What happened?” Regina’s heart sunk to her stomach at the sound of Emma’s broken voice. It was obvious she had been crying. Regina thought hard before she gasped. “Emma, sweetheart. I promise I had no idea Kat posted that photo. Graham was comforting me. I promise it was nothing more.” She pleaded, her own lip quivering as she heard Emma cry. 

It took a few long moments before Emma replied, Ruby shooting her a sympathetic look. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes. “I...I slept with someone else, Regina. It’s why I’ve been ignoring you. I’m never going to forgive myself and I’m so, so unbelievably sorry. I drank way too much and I couldn’t stop myself. I didn’t mean for it to happen, it just did and I’m so, so, so-“ Emma was cut off when a soft sniffle came through the phone, her heart shattering even more. 

“I loved you.” Came Regina’s broken voice as she cried, her whole world suddenly caving in. “I loved you more than I’ve loved anyone and you couldn’t trust me, even for one night.” Her voice raised in volume as she felt her heart constricted in her chest. “I have NEVER lied to you, Emma. I have NEVER hidden anything from you, EVER.” She paused as a sob wracked her body, glad she was home alone. “And this is how you repay me?” The last sentence came out softly, her whole body deflating in a single breath. “I trusted you. I only asked you did the same.”

Emma let out a choked sob as Regina ranted, but the last thing she expected was to hear that final click. 

The line went dead, Emma’s heart shattering into a million pieces as the call disconnected, Regina’s voice echoing through her head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not even a little sorry. I cried so much while I wrote this, I hope you all can forgive me. I promised angst, and I delivered


	9. Chapter 9

It was like learning to breathe again. Life without Regina. Every breath felt hard, every intake felt like breathing in fiberglass. 

Especially now, staring down at the pregnancy test on the counter, facedown. 

One more minute. 

Regina had texted Emma a week after Emma had told her, saying that she couldn’t trust Emma again. Saying that they could still be friends, even when they both knew it wasn’t true. Emma had broken both of their hearts with her mistake. Emma had lost Regina’s trust. 

30 more seconds. 

Emma had cried and begged. Leaving voicemails for Regina to forgive her. Begging that she’d just talk to her. Begging that she’d give her another chance. That she loved her and it was a mistake. That she’d never love anyone as much as she loved her. 

15 more seconds. 

It had been a month since they’d last spoken. Since Emma had realized she’d missed her period. Since she’d realized that something was wrong. That Neal hadn’t used protection. Since Neal hadn’t called her or texted her back. Since he had disappeared. 

10 more seconds. 

Emma had spent days crying, reasoning with herself that she wasn’t pregnant. That it was stress from the breakup. That school and losing Regina was too much. Since eating next to nothing and sleeping next to nothing was messing with her. 

5 more seconds. 

It was all too real now as she stared at her phone, the last five seconds ticking by until the alarm went off. She prayed to every deity she could think of, prayed that she wasn’t alone in this. Prayed that Regina would text her that she was sorry, that she forgave her. Prayed that it wasn’t positive. She took a deep breath, glancing toward the counter as she clicked “dismiss”. 

Emma pushed herself off the lid of the toilet, bile rising in her throat as she involuntarily reached for the test, her body moving much faster than her mind. 

Two deep breaths, eyes closed tight. She flipped over the test, her vision blurring with tears still unshed. 

Positive.


	10. Epilogue

“Henry Swan! Let’s go!” Emma shouted up the stairs, her son dawdling at the top. The ten year old boy rushed down the stairs, nearly colliding with his mother. 

“Sorry, ma. I had to get my gameboy charger!” He flashed a toothy grin, holding up the tangled cord. 

Emma just playfully rolled her eyes, pointing to the door. “Let’s go, you little butt. We’re already an hour behind schedule.” 

They both made their way out of the apartment complex and into the muggy Boston June air. Her faithful Bug sat at the curb, already packed up for their summer vacation. A five hour drive was ahead of them to a small town on the coast of Maine. Emma hadn’t thought of Regina in years, and when her friend August suggested he come visit him in a small town in Maine, she hadn’t realized exactly where she was going. 

The drive was long, but blasting music and teasing Henry certainly made it bearable. Emma was certain she was lost, her cell signal dead until they passed a sign. 

“Ma! Look! Welcome to Storybrooke!” Henry’s excited chatter rang through the car, the boy practically bouncing in his seat. 

Emma almost slammed on her breaks, her heart stopping dead in her chest. She knew that sign. A memory from over ten years ago. 

“Shit.” She mumbled to herself, glancing over at Henry. “Hey kid, we’re gonna take a quick detour before we go to the bed and breakfast. Gotta let August know we arrived.” 

Henry just shrugged and looked back out the window as the tiny town came into view. “This place is tiny. Why did we come here?” 

“I told you, uncle August missed me and he hasn’t seen you in a few years. There’s a beach and some beautiful parks nearby. This is going to be two weeks of relaxation and forgetting about the outside world for a little bit.” She explained, glancing around the sidewalks, her heart hammering in her chest. There was only one person in this town she desperately wanted to see, and it wasn’t August. 

Regina was here. Or well, she used to be. Maybe she still was. 

Emma’s thoughts were racing as she put in August’s address, taking her to a small woodwork shop on the outside of town. “Wait here, Hen. I’m gonna go check in with August for a minute.” She climbed from the car, the door creaking as she did. 

An older man appeared, his face confused before he broke into a huge smile. “Is that Emma Swan!?” He said, wiping his hands on a rag he had pulled from his pocket. “As I live and breathe, you’ve gotten old.” Marco teased her as Emma pulled him into a bear hug. 

“It’s only been five years, Marco. Don’t act like I’m a shriveled old woman.” She said, laughing as she pulled back. “Where’s August? I gotta talk to him for a moment.” She said, peering around them. 

“Swan!” 

Emma spun around, a wide grin on her face as August sauntered up to her. She threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. “I missed you.” She said as she choked up with tears. She still rarely cried, but it had been five years since she had seen her foster brother, the only person she now kept in touch with from her childhood. 

“Don’t get all emotional on me now, girl. Where’s Henry?” He asked as he held her at arm’s length, looking her over for a moment. “You look good-“

This sentence was cut off abruptly as she punched him lightly in the arm, frowning slightly. “Why the HELL didn’t you remind me this is where SHE lived.” 

August visibly cringed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I figured you knew. I didn’t want to bring it up. I know how touchy you get when Regina is brought up.”

“Is she still here?” Emma asked, crossing her arms over her chest. Her heart began to beat wildly again, her body trying to decide if she wanted to cry or throw up. 

“She’s...uh- yeah, she’s still here. She’s mayor now. Cora died a few years back and she was easily elected.” August said, watching as Emma’s face paled. “Hey, don’t worry about it. She’s usually too busy to venture anywhere but her home and city hall. You’ll probably never see her.” 

Emma groaned, running a hand through her hair. “I don’t know if I don’t want to see her, August. I mean, it’s been ten years. I need closure. I-“ she stopped, shook her head and sighed. “I just want to explain to her that I never stopped loving her. I get if she doesn’t feel the same, but I just need that closure.” 

August nodded solemnly, shoving his hands in his back pockets. “In the five years we’ve lived here, she’s never been with anyone. No one has ever seen her with anyone. And I bet she was the same for the five previous years. Word is she disappeared after she graduated, came back shortly before we did to run for mayor.” He quickly pulled out his phone and brought up the map. “Here.” He zoomed in on a house. “She lives in her childhood home. 108 Mifflin. Just take Main and take a right by the pawn shop. You should see it on the right.” 

Emma nodded, swallowing thickly. “I’m gonna drop Henry off at the bed and breakfast, then I’ll go see her. I don’t want to bombard her, but there’s no time like the present.” She said, trying to force a smile. 

“Leave him with me.” August said, throwing an arm around her shoulder as Henry got out of the car. “Go talk to her and I’ll keep an eye on the kid.” 

Emma swallowed again and nodded. “Thanks August, I owe you so much.” 

——

Regina was pulling dinner out of her oven when her doorbell rang. She frowned as she straightened up, setting the pan of lasagne on the oven top. She wasn’t expecting visitors, and no one ever dropped by. 

Her heels clicked on the wooden floor as she walked to the front door. She looked through the window beside the door, and her heart stopped. 

The woman was turned away from the door, but she knew who she was the instant her eyes landed on her. Memories from years ago flooded her brain, her emotions suddenly drawing the air from her lungs. 

Her hand was placed on the handle of the door, but her body refused to let her open the door. The woman turned slightly, and Regina choked. It was Emma, her Emma. The Emma who had broken her heart years ago, the Emma she had shut from her life with a promise to herself to never speak or think of her again, no matter how hard she tried to. 

She was suddenly opening the door, a deep seeded grief taking a hold of her heart again. 

Emma suddenly whipped around, both women staring at each other for a moment, neither of them daring to speak. 

Regina broke the silence first, her mouth falling open slightly as she spoke Emma’s name, almost unbelieving that she was standing there, that her mind was playing tricks on her. 

She watched as Emma shoved her hands in her back pockets, chewing on her lower lip as she rocked back on her heels, staring up at Regina with those big, beautiful green eyes. 

“Hi.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is it! I’m keeping it open ended. I hope you all enjoyed my fic! Keep an eye out for the short sequel within the next week!


End file.
